CAN OUR LOVED ONES REALLY SEND US MESSAGES?

Dedicated in memory of

Sean Lucero

July 25, 1988-February 15, 2016

Can our loved ones really send us messages from above?  Man, wouldn't that be great if they could?  Guess what?  They can and DO!  When we lose a loved one, our hearts break and sometimes we feel we can't go on without one LAST word, touch, kiss or hug.  We just need one more minute with them! 

I want to share a VERY PERSONAL story with you.  I work with this very nice gentleman that lost his son about 4 years ago.  He is still struggling with the loss and we talk about it every now and then.  He came in my office the other day and ask if we could talk.  I said of course.  He came in and sat down in one of the chairs that sit in front of my desk and almost in a hesitant way asked could he ask me a question.  

This gentleman's name is Ron Lucero.  I have known Ron for years and he knows that I am very into signs, paranormal, spirits and that stuff so for him to act a "little shy" about asking me anything was a little weird. Ron says, "do you think Sean could send me signs that he is still around?"  I looked at him and said, "of course he can!"  He said, "oh do you think God would let him?"  This question hit me like a ton of bricks.  My heart physically hurt.  Did this man think that because his son was in heaven that he could never see or hear from again?  My heart was breaking and I was thinking...how many other people must think this way?  That their loved ones can't give us a message or sign because they are in heaven?  

Ron continued to tell me that over the Christmas holiday's he was at home with his wife and was feeling very depressed about Sean and was struggling to shake this bad feeling.  He said it was just one of THOSE BAD DAYS that we have all experienced when we lose someone close to us.  He said his wife was asking if he was ok. He said yes just a little sad but the longer he sat there the sadder he was getting.  Then all of the sudden a music box sitting on the mantel close to Sean's picture just goes off by itself!!!  It just starts playing music.  He said he looked at his wife and was like what the heck and she looked just as surprised as he was!  Neither of them had touched it all day....it just started to play all by itself!!!  Was this Sean?  Simple answer.  In my opinion, yes.  Without a doubt.

Two things about this story, says to me Sean was trying to send his Dad a message from above.  First, the minute his Dad heard the music going off his first thought was how did that happen and was it Sean? So what does this do?  It makes Ron STOP thinking about the loss and the sad thoughts and focuses on it might be Sean trying to give him a message.  What's the message?  The music symbolizes...something happy.  Something SPECIAL.  It is a distraction from the sadness.  Is that a coincidence?  Nope.  I don't think so.  Second thing, it makes Ron think about Sean in a different way.  That he is near, that he is still with him in spirit and trying to let him know that.  Now, Ron's heart is a little less heavy thinking about Sean in a positive way.

So, back to the question Ron asked.  "Does God let our loved ones give us signs?"  Ok.  I want people to understand what I'm about to say.  God is a loving God.  When you die and go to heaven PLEASE don't think that...…. that's it.  Your loved one's are gone.  If you are struggling or maybe you just need some guidance... of course, God will let your loved ones come for a "visitation".  He actually allows them to be with us always.  He would never want you to surfer and neither would your loved ones.

Here's the thing about signs.  I could write for days about ALL the signs we get from above but for this, I'll keep it short.  Sometimes we get signs from above when we don't even realize we need one but when you ask for a sign.....and get it...……..don't blow it off!  Don't dismiss it as a coincidence.  They are HERE for us and doing everything they can to let us know that.  Signs are given to validate they are still with us.  Whether it's a penny on the ground, a feather in an unusual place, something misplaced that shows up somewhere it shouldn't be....whatever the case may be...accept it.....be grateful and say "Thank you."

One more thing, ASK for signs!!!  If you remember nothing of this story.....remember to ASK for signs.  Make it something that you normally wouldn't see.  For example......Ask to see a purple pig.  You know that isn't something you see everyday SO when you DO see it....you'll know that it is TRULY a sign from above. :)

I want to thank Ron Lucero and his family for letting me share this very personal story and hopefully it helps someone else. :)  RIP Sean.  

ARE WE STILL BEST FRIENDS WHEN WE CROSS OVER?

Are we still BEST FRIENDS when we cross to the other side?  This was a question I was asked this past weekend and I thought I would blog about it because I can only assume many people wonder about this after losing a best friend.  What will they do without them?  Right?  This is probably the number one concern of people that feel they have a  "soul connection" to another human being.  The one person or multi people that you feel know you the best and love you unconditionally.  The person that has been there for you through the good and the bad.  The person that made you laugh when all you wanted to do was cry.  The person that screamed the loudest when you succeeded and was your biggest fan.  Guess what?  Those feelings never change!

The Golden Girls 

One of my FAVORITE shows about Best Friends(Does that tell my age? LOL)

 

When a person dies this doesn't mean you never get to see or speak to them again.  Of course you still can!  And want to know something else.....they are ALWAYS there for you and even though you may not directly hear the voices you can feel their presence when you need it the most and sometimes when you least expect it.

Here's the deal.  Many people think that once you cross over and go to Heaven....that's it.  No more communicating with the living because they are in Heaven. Right? Wrong!  I am going to say this in a "Beckyism".  When people go to Heaven..... God doesn't say, "You are in Heaven now, you can not go back and help your friends and family in their time of need or sadness".  God is a loving God.  So he absolutely allows you to "visit" your friends and family to give them comfort or guide them in some way and then return "HOME".

So, the next time, you feel sad about losing your Best Friend, know that your Best Friend is not gone.  Think of it this way.... he/she is only in another room next to you.  You can't see them but you can hear them and feel that they are near.  So....talk away!!!!  Say what you need to just as your friend was right next to you (because they probably are) and take comfort in knowing they are not "gone" they have just stepped in the room "next door".

They still know when you do something silly and are laughing right along with you.  They know when you are doing something you love and they are right there supporting you.  And when you are sad and lonely, they have their arms wrapped around you gently as they always did.  The "soul connection" is NEVER lost are gone it's just how you see them now.  And one more thing.....every time you smile...…….so do they!!!!!!!!!  So don't forget to smile. :)

Losing someone close to you can be so overwhelming that it is hard to move forward.....so I want to share a little secret of mine that I hope will make you smile at least for a moment.  When you see a beautiful sunset or sunrise in all the beautiful pinks, purples, blues and yellows....that is JUST FOR YOU!!!!  No one else.....but YOU!!!!  It is a way that your loved ones can show you how they are feeling and how much love they are sending directly to YOU!!!!!!

 

Just for ME at one of my favorite

places from someone I miss dearly.

I couldn't help but smile.  Thank you.

 

 Because I am such a huge fan of The Golden Girls I wanted to share this video of Rue McClanahan (Blanche) talking about a sign that she received from her Best Friend Rill.  Don't forget to ask for a sign from your loved one they just may be waiting for you to ask.  :)

Sorry, A&E blocked me from sharing the video, but you can look it up on Youtube. :)

For those of you who need a sign!

 

DO OUR DEPARTED PETS GIVE US SIGNS THEY ARE STILL HERE?

Your heart is breaking.....and the tears come pouring down your face like a raging water fall.  You can't believe how much it hurts.  How real the pain is!  If you have ever lost a believed pet like I did this past weekend, you understand completely what I'm talking about.

If you are a pet owner, no matter what the pet....a dog, cat, bird or even snakes (sorry, snakes scare the crap out of me) you develop a love for them that is unconditional.  When you had a bad day.... you've wrecked the car, and have no idea what to do now....you were still greeted with a long, wet kiss on the face when you walked through the door and suddenly what you thought was the worst day ever...doesn't seem so bad after all.  Or your are sobbing at that sad, sad last episode of Friends,  and your "best friend" jumps in your lap and looks up at you with those big brown eyes and gives you THAT SWEET look of "it's going to ok" and you can't help but smile.  Yep.  That's the power they have on us.

So, what happens when we lose them?  We grieve and grieve.  You think about them everyday and can hardly look at a picture of them without breaking down.  Suddenly, strange things start to happen.  You think you see something run through the hall.  You see something jump on your bed that isn't there.  But here's the deal.  Sometimes when we see apparitions or ghosts of a living person, they are here for several reasons.  Maybe because of a tragic event, unfinished business and sometimes the person doesn't even know they are dead.  But pets are different.....
 

There is only one reason their spirit stays behind.  And that's YOU!  Our pets entire lives are built around us and being our companion.  Nothing makes a pet happier than pleasing their owner.  So, guess what?  When they die....that doesn't change. And let me tell, thanks goodness it doesn't!  

Me and Holly-My sweet girl that died in 2015

My boy Tanner.  RIP 

This post is dedicated to my beloved Tanner.  My best friend for 15 years.  RIP my sweet boy.  You take a piece of my heart with you. (Feb. 2004-Feb.2019)

So, if you think you have lost your "best friend" you haven't.  The shadow in hall or the dog toy that suddenly shows up out of know where....is just he/she paying you a visit.  They will give you signs in many different ways to let you know they are still right by your side.  

I want to tell you about my personal experience of a message Tanner gave me the day he died.  My poor boy, Tanner was 15 years old and even though his body was still going strong in spite of wobbly legs and being blind as a bat.  I always thought I would be able to make "that HARD decision" when the time came that he couldn't walk or move anymore BUT NEVER did I think I would have to make that decision because of his MENTAL state of mine.  He started pacing about a week ago.  He would scratch on the doors like he wanted out, but the doors where open.  He would stare into the corners of the room and seem to be so lost.  I wasn't sure what was happening so I took him to the vet who diagnosed him with Dog Dementia.  Who knew that was even a thing!!!!!  She said he just doesn't recognize where he is and it could be scary for him.

She gave me some medicine to try....but it didn't help at all.  After about a week of this, I couldn't take it anymore.  The thought that he was scared and didn't know where he was and being blind on top of that...was more than my heart could take.  I called the vet Friday morning and said, "today is the day".  I feed him his favorite food and gave him his favorite treats and in my mind tried to make it just like any other normal day.  Talking and playing with him first thing in the morning.  But then it was time.  I drove to vet and let my boy go to Heaven without me.  I had never had to make this kind of decision before.  And for anyone who has, even though you know it is the right thing to do, making this kind of decision is the worst feeling ever!!!!  

I walked to the car and began to sob uncontrollably with my hands over my face.  Had I done the right thing?  Did he have more time?  Should I have waited?  I needed help.  I needed a sign.  I let my hands drop and looked to the heavens and said, "Tanner, PLEASE I need a sign that I did the right thing.  I can't move on unless I know."  I slowly started the car and just by habit I turned on the radio.  And there was only ONE sentence that came on.  It was Carrie Underwood singing Amazing Grace...but I didn't hear the whole song only the last sentence...……………..I was blind, but now I see.  And not another thing was said.  Not  a commercial...…..not a DJ for a few seconds.  There was definitely a pause before the DJ began to talk.  And with that, I raised my head and said "Thank you" and drove home with a smile on my face.

Now, I wanted to include an article written by Stanley Coren Ph D., that I just read that has nothing to do with ghosts, or ghost spirits, but it does have to do with death and how when we have more than one pet that the other pet grieves as well.  That's right.  Your other pet.  The one that will stare into the kitchen looking at the dog bowl as if they are seeing something.  Maybe they are!  But lets not forget them in this process.  They grieve as well.  And you know, as much as your pet loved you...they loved your other pet to.  So, it is no surprise that they would come back to say "hi" to them as well.  The article below talks about your pets grief.  I thought it was really good and just wanted to include it with this blog.

Do Dogs Grieve Over the Loss of an Animal Companion?

A poignant study confirms what many owners suspected about pets and grieving.

Posted Nov 10, 2016

• It's well-known that dogs form strong emotional bonds with members of their human family, and often suffer grief when a loved one dies or moves away. However, one might wonder if dogs suffer an equal sense of loss when an animal companion who has lived with them in the same home suddenly disappears. 

I recently visited the home of some friends who have always had Boston Terriers as their companion dogs, usually in pairs, and always in the traditional black and white coloration. Quite often, they also had a cat as a pet, which was usually black-and-white to match the dogs. I always felt that it was Violet's work as an interior decorator that compelled her to have color-coordinated pets. On this visit, I found only one dog in the house. Lou explained that in the course of a few months they had lost one of their Boston Terriers (Lily) and shortly thereafter their cat (Rosie). Lou went on to say, "Now we only have Daisy. She took the loss of Lily and Rosie pretty hard, so we are looking to get a puppy companion for her as soon as possible."

I sat down on the sofa where Violet was sitting with Daisy. She said:

"Daisy was really upset when Lily passed. She kept checking the places where Lily usually took her naps, and when she didn't find her she would whine or whimper. She also got really clingy and demanded a lot of affection from me. Things got better after a month or so but then Rosie, our cat, died. I was surprised to find that Daisy showed the same kinds of behaviors when she couldn't find Rosie. Daisy kept looking for her in her usual spots, began whimpering again, and seemed to want to be close to me. She even stopped eating as enthusiastically as she usually did, as though she had lost part of her appetite."

Although Daisy's behavior at the loss of her canine companion was familiar to me, I was a bit surprised to learn she showed signs of grief at the loss of the cat as well. However, a recent study published in the journal Animals attempts to catalog the behaviors of dogs and cats when they suffer the loss of an animal housemate, and what the study found suggests that Daisy's behavior is not atypical. The study was conducted by a team of researchers headed by Jessica Walker of the New Zealand Companion Animal Counsel who collected data pertaining to 159 dogs and 152 cats. The data consisted of questionnaire responses from pet owners in New Zealand and Australia who owned multiple pets at the same time and had lost one within the past five years. The pet owners were asked to recall how the surviving pet responded to the disappearance of their companion.

One of the most common behaviors observed in dogs was to continually check the places where their lost housemate normally napped or rested. This behavior was found in 60 percent of the dogs (regardless of whether the lost companion was a dog or a cat) and 63 percent of the cats. Virtually the same proportion of surviving pets demanded more affection or became clingy and needy (61 percent of dogs and 62 percent of cats). Increases in whining and whimpering was less frequent, occurring 27 percent of the time in dogs. However, increased vocalizing was much more common in cats (43 percent). Roughly one in three dogs and cats reduced the amount of food they ate and the speed in which they ate it (35 percent in dogs and 31 percent in cats). Dogs were more likely to increase the amount of time that they spent sleeping (34 percent), which was less likely in cats (20 percent). The interesting thing is that these are all behaviors one might observe in a young human child experiencing grief and stress because of the loss of a human family member.

article continues after advertisement.

Two aspects of this data surprised me. The first is that the cats seem to show grief-like behaviors to the same extent as the dogs. The second is that the dogs seem to show an equal amount of grief-related behavioral changes when the animal companion they lost was a cat rather than another dog.

One particularly interesting finding is that some animal behaviorists believe that the grief response in dogs can be reduced if the animal has a chance to view their deceased companion's body. The idea is that this provides closure: The dog will understand that their companion is no longer alive and is not coming back. In the study, 58 percent of the dogs and 42 percent of the cats got to view the body of their companion. The majority (73 percent) took the time to sniff and investigate their deceased housemate. However, no one reported behavioral differences between the animals that saw, and those that did not see, a dead companion's body. This seems to confirm that dogs act very much like human children younger than four, in that they do not have a concept of death as a final and irrevocable separation. Instead, they simply feel the loss of the presence, friendship, and companionship of their loved one; that loss causes their stress and grief-like behaviors.

Source: Anna Baburkina/Shutterstock

The conclusion to draw from this study is that dogs and cats suffer from stress when a companion animal from their household dies. Because of this, they show behaviors which can be interpreted as grief. Further, a dog is just as likely to grieve over the loss of the household cat as it is for the loss of a companion dog.

From me Becky:

Give them extra attention, toys and treats.  Remove or put away all the toys played with prior to the death of their companion.  Anything to do with the scent on it from the companion that died should be put aside and new things brought into the home to bring in new scents and memories.  

And may I offer this suggestion if you lost your only pet.  The love that you had for them, doesn't go away...but the love can also be used to give to another.  The thing you notice...is the loneliness.  The dog not at your feet, no barking, no toys to pick up, no one to greet you when you come home..... it all makes the silence deafening!  Consider getting another pet that needs a good, loving home. 

ALL GOOD DOGS GO TO HEAVEN. RIGHT? ARE DO THEY STAY BEHIND AFTER DEATH AS A LOYAL COMPANION?

You think you feel something at the foot of your bed.  You feel something snuggling against your leg.  What is going on?  Could this REALLY be your beloved pet that has passed?  Of course it could!  We all have, more than likely, experienced the loss of a close member of the family....your pet.  If you are a pet owner, no matter what the pet....a dog, cat, bird or even snakes you develop a love for them that is unconditional.  On that bad day you had, they don't care.  The day you wrecked you car, you were still greeted with a long, wet lick in the face or when you are sobbing at that sad, sad last episode of Friends,  your "best friend" jumps in your lap and gives you THAT SWEET look of "it's going to ok".

So, what happens when we loose them?  We grieve and grieve.  This I know first hand, as I lost my little dog Holly very unexpectedly and everyday my I think about her.  I can barely look at a picture of her without breaking down.  But here's the deal.  I have seen her and I have felt her.  Do pets really have spirits that stay behind?  Some do.  Listen, sometimes when we see apparitions or ghosts it's because of a tragic event and the person doesn't know they are dead.  Or they have to make sure someone completes "their" journey.  And sometimes, it's just to help us with the grieving process.

Pets are different.  There is only one reason their spirit stays behind.  And that's YOU!  Our pets entire lives are built around us and being our companion.  Nothing makes a pet happier than pleasing their owner.  So, guess what?  When they die....that doesn't change. And let me tell, thanks goodness it doesn't!  

Me and Holly

The night Holly died I had gone to the store and I came home and found her dead by the door and I have always thought, if I hadn't gone to the store that night maybe I could have saved her.  Was she by the door waiting for me to return?  The guilt was and is as real as anything I have ever felt.  Holly used to sleep with me so I had her buried right by my bedroom window so that she could still "sleep close" to me.  Anyway, after that sad story, I can tell you that I heard Holly many nights walking in the hall like she used to do and I would see her literally running through the house.  I think Holly knew how much pain I was in and wanted to make it better...yes, even from the other side.  And guess what? EVERY TIME I saw her or heard her I would smile.  So, if you think you have lost your "best friend" that always had nothing but unconditional love for you, you haven't.  The shadow in hall or the dog toy that suddenly shows up out of know-where....just might be your "best friend" paying you a visit.

Now, I wanted to include an article written by Stanley Coren Ph D., that I just read that has nothing to do with ghosts, or ghost spirits, but it does have to do with death and how when we have more than one pet that the other pet grieves as well.  That's right.  Your other pet.  The one that will stare into the kitchen looking at the dog bowl as if they are seeing something.  Maybe they are!  But lets not forget them in this process.  They grieve as well.  And you know, as much as your pet loved you...they loved your other pet to.  So, it is no surprise that they would come back to say "hi" to them as well.  The article below talks about your pets grief.  I thought it was really good and just wanted to include it with this blog.

So, I guess what I am trying to say is...your beloved pet may still be around. So have some treats handy...

Do Dogs Grieve Over the Loss of an Animal Companion?

A poignant study confirms what many owners suspected about pets and grieving.

Posted Nov 10, 2016

• 

Source: John Perry photo — Creative Commons License

It's well-known that dogs form strong emotional bonds with members of their human family, and often suffer grief when a loved one dies or moves away. However, one might wonder if dogs suffer an equal sense of loss when an animal companion who has lived with them in the same home suddenly disappears. 

I recently visited the home of some friends who have always had Boston Terriers as their companion dogs, usually in pairs, and always in the traditional black and white coloration. Quite often, they also had a cat as a pet, which was usually black-and-white to match the dogs. I always felt that it was Violet's work as an interior decorator that compelled her to have color-coordinated pets. On this visit, I found only one dog in the house. Lou explained that in the course of a few months they had lost one of their Boston Terriers (Lily) and shortly thereafter their cat (Rosie). Lou went on to say, "Now we only have Daisy. She took the loss of Lily and Rosie pretty hard, so we are looking to get a puppy companion for her as soon as possible."
I sat down on the sofa where Violet was sitting with Daisy. She said:

"Daisy was really upset when Lily passed. She kept checking the places where Lily usually took her naps, and when she didn't find her she would whine or whimper. She also got really clingy and demanded a lot of affection from me. Things got better after a month or so but then Rosie, our cat, died. I was surprised to find that Daisy showed the same kinds of behaviors when she couldn't find Rosie. Daisy kept looking for her in her usual spots, began whimpering again, and seemed to want to be close to me. She even stopped eating as enthusiastically as she usually did, as though she had lost part of her appetite."

Although Daisy's behavior at the loss of her canine companion was familiar to me, I was a bit surprised to learn she showed signs of grief at the loss of the cat as well. However, a recent study published in the journal Animals attempts to catalog the behaviors of dogs and cats when they suffer the loss of an animal housemate, and what the study found suggests that Daisy's behavior is not atypical. The study was conducted by a team of researchers headed by Jessica Walker of the New Zealand Companion Animal Counsel who collected data pertaining to 159 dogs and 152 cats. The data consisted of questionnaire responses from pet owners in New Zealand and Australia who owned multiple pets at the same time and had lost one within the past five years. The pet owners were asked to recall how the surviving pet responded to the disappearance of their companion.

One of the most common behaviors observed in dogs was to continually check the places where their lost housemate normally napped or rested. This behavior was found in 60 percent of the dogs (regardless of whether the lost companion was a dog or a cat) and 63 percent of the cats. Virtually the same proportion of surviving pets demanded more affection or became clingy and needy (61 percent of dogs and 62 percent of cats). Increases in whining and whimpering was less frequent, occurring 27 percent of the time in dogs. However, increased vocalizing was much more common in cats (43 percent). Roughly one in three dogs and cats reduced the amount of food they ate and the speed in which they ate it (35 percent in dogs and 31 percent in cats). Dogs were more likely to increase the amount of time that they spent sleeping (34 percent), which was less likely in cats (20 percent). The interesting thing is that these are all behaviors one might observe in a young human child experiencing grief and stress because of the loss of a human family member.

article continues after advertisement.
 

Two aspects of this data surprised me. The first is that the cats seem to show grief-like behaviors to the same extent as the dogs. The second is that the dogs seem to show an equal amount of grief-related behavioral changes when the animal companion they lost was a cat rather than another dog.
One particularly interesting finding is that some animal behaviorists believe that the grief response in dogs can be reduced if the animal has a chance to view their deceased companion's body. The idea is that this provides closure: The dog will understand that their companion is no longer alive and is not coming back. In the study, 58 percent of the dogs and 42 percent of the cats got to view the body of their companion. The majority (73 percent) took the time to sniff and investigate their deceased housemate. However, no one reported behavioral differences between the animals that saw, and those that did not see, a dead companion's body. This seems to confirm that dogs act very much like human children younger than four, in that they do not have a concept of death as a final and irrevocable separation. Instead, they simply feel the loss of the presence, friendship, and companionship of their loved one; that loss causes their stress and grief-like behaviors.

Source: Anna Baburkina/Shutterstock

The conclusion to draw from this study is that dogs and cats suffer from stress when a companion animal from their household dies. Because of this, they show behaviors which can be interpreted as grief. Further, a dog is just as likely to grieve over the loss of the household cat as it is for the loss of a companion dog.

VOICE OF AN ANGEL!!! JUST HAD TO SHARE!

I just had to share this with you!!!!!  What do you think?

PERSONAL CONNECTIONS. DO WE HAVE ONE???

At a time when ghostly encounters are sadly and most often depicted as, and defined by people covered in electronic gadgets and shouting out the names of the deceased into moldy basements and dark attics, is that our "connection" to the other side?  Does that mean we have a "personal connection"?

Communicating with the spirits of the dead is a timeless fascination, and today is no exception.  Our society is inundated with paranormal media, leaving many to wonder how much of what we see and hear is real. If someone claims to have "all the answers"...beware...none of us...and I do mean NONE OF US have ALL the answers.  Now with that said, I DO believe that some...not all of us...have had TRULY personal connections with someone that has passed away....be it a loved one, friend, teacher, spouse or someone that has just touched our life in a very special way.

So lets talk about that.  Do I feel I have a "personal connection" with MY Nan?(Grandfather) You BETTER believe that I DO!!!!!  And so do MANY of you!!!  A "personal connection" with someone that has passed away can be something like.......lets say  a "feeling" a moment that "beyond a shadow doubt" that you feel or sense that person is with you in that exact moment.  You suddenly smile for know reason, you shed a tear just because you looked out your window and saw a blue bird on your mothers bird feeder......and you remember very vividly her joy as she would watch the birds out her window.

I am going to share a VERY PERSONAL experience of someone very dear to me and that I love so much and are so honored that he would allow me to write about HIS "personal connection".  This story is about my boyfriend Deak and his "personal connection" to his wife who he lost in 2008 to cancer.  She left behind two small boys, one 9-Grant and one was 12-Chase and one devastated husband who she had been with for 26 wonderful years.  Let me also state that writing this is no easy task but I want you, my readers, to understand that you CAN and DO have "personal connections" to your loved ones.....there is no need for you to feel like you have to have other people believe you in a world where "doubt" seems to come all to easy when you are talking about the paranormal.

As stated, Deak and Susan had been married for many years.  They enjoyed an exceptionally good relationship, they respected each other, loved each other and were the best of friends. They both loved to travel and many times took the boys on memorable vacations. Their life consisted of TWO VERY IMPORTANT things......their boys, Grant(9) and Chase(12) and HOCKEY..........but not just any hockey team......they lived and breathed CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS Hockey!!!!  Deak is originally from Chicago and Susan from Minnesota where they both developed a very passionate love for the sport.

Deak and Susan had a small but comfortable home when Deak began to climb the "corporate ladder".  One day Susan noticed that she had a lump on her inner thigh that became painful and sore.  Deciding to go to the doctor and have it checked out a biopsy was performed and the news unfortunately wasn't good.......completely blindsided.........she had cancer. After many doctors visits and several years of surgery's  Susan was diagnosed CANCER FREE!!!! They couldn't have been happier!!!!  They decided to pursue a bigger house and better school system for their sons.  So they bought a beautiful new home and moved in on Deak's birthday in July, 2007.  Things seem to be going just the way they planned.  Susan was a stay at home mom and devoted her time to taking the boys to and from Hockey practice and making a loving home for Deak.  Deak continued to work hard and became a successful VP of a Fortune 500 company.

Enjoying her new life in their dream home, Susan was soon told that the cancer had returned. Being of strong will.....Susan never lost faith that she would "beat the cancer" and a couple of times they thought she had. But, the cancer kept coming back..... and each time with more of a vengeance than the time before.  The cancer would soon take it's toll on Susan's body turning this beautiful, young woman into a weak and frail soul that soon became bed ridden.  But this NEVER affected Susan's need to still try and be a loving Mom and Wife to Deak and the boys....and Deak would not falter.....not allowing anyone BUT him to care for his love....he worked during the day....and the minute he arrived home after a long days work....he would stay up all night giving Susan her medication, her shots and care for her in everyway possible.  After several months of Chemo and sleepless nights of administering pain medication....... Deak and Susan lost their battle......leaving Deak alone with two small boys who would be growing up without a Mother to raise on his own.

Deak and the boys turned to traveling  and music as a way of coping with the loss of Susan following the group U2 around the country and traveling to the Blackhawks games.  Now, here is where the "personal connection" comes in IN A BIG WAY!!!  It was 2010 and the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup after forty-nine years!!!  Deak and the boys were on CLOUD NINE!!!! Tradition is that the first game AFTER the season ends, they (the Blackhawks) celebrate by hanging the Championship banner in the stadium.  Deak and the boys were sitting in their living room of the house they had bought with the thought that this would be a place Susan and them would be for a long, long time enjoying many fond memories.  The Blackhawks celebration ceremony came on and the song WITH OR WITHOUT YOU by U2 began to play.  This was a SPECIAL day for more than one reason.........for more than the Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup............. it was Deak and Susan's wedding anniversary!!!!  The song is very moving if you listen to the words.......it's about going on WITH OR WITHOUT someone.   Deak and the boys were shocked and became very emotional as the song began to play..........for them, hearing WITH OR WITHOUT YOU during the Blackhawks celebration, they felt her presence.  They KNEW this was no coincidence, as this was her way of letting them know she is still a part of their lives.

So you tell me...............was this a "personal connection" from the other side???? Blackhawks win the Cup???? The U2 Song??? And on their wedding anniversary???

Now, I know "personal connections" are different for everyone.  But make no mistake about it......Do we have personal connections to our loved ones that have passed????  The simple answer is "YES"........ just ask Deak and the boys.

                                                  IN MEMORY OF SUSAN JEAN DEACON

 

Video with the words....

  

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU HUNT GHOSTS????

A little chocolate milk always makes things better...

LOL.  I hear it all the time..."Why in the world would you want to hunt ghosts"?  And you know my answer is always the same...."because I LOVE IT!!!".  I know that is hard for some people to understand, and yes I do realize it is NOT your NORMAL kind of hobby but FOR ME....it is my life passion!

I had a conversation with a lady this week and she just couldn't understand how I could LOVE something that is scary and sometimes dangerous.  Well, don't we ALL love something or maybe someone that is sometimes scary and dangerous?  Communicating with the dead is not at all scary to me.....the way I look at it is.....every time we go out to investigate.... of course there is going to be some element of danger involved,  but to me no more than...lets say playing sports...football, hockey...or even something more calm like hiking....or running....there is ALWAYS a chance that something could go wrong and someone get hurt.  Right?  But we still play football, hockey, go running or hiking... it doesn't stop us because we LOVE it!

Every paranormal investigator has his or her own reason that they sit in the dark all alone, or go into a haunted cemetery at night and spend hours...but I also have another reason that I do what I do.
And any of you that know me or have been following me for these past years know why. :)  That's right...because of my grandfather.

The reason I want to write about this today is because I recently met someone that I felt was lost.  And we have all been there at one time or another after a loved one has died we sometimes just don't know what to do.  How to get over the pain...how to move on.  Is it hard to lose someone you love....YOU BET....is it easy to move on....NEVER.  This is where I think we sometimes make the mistake of thinking....if we LET THEM GO or move on.....then we have lost them FOREVER.  That is just NOT the case.  When I lost my grandfather I was devastated and just wasn't sure how I was going to make it in this big, bad world without him. And to be honest, after weeks of sheer pain....and grief...I decided I WOULDN'T go on in this big, bad world without him.....there had to be a way to keep him here with me!!!! 

So, I started reading everything I could get my hands on about the AFTERLIFE and the PARANORMAL....different ways to communicate with a loved one that had pasted.  Long story...short.....that's how I got to where I am today.  Over 30 years later of researching the paranormal....it has become just as much a part of me as breathing.  If I had not gotten into the paranormal field, I'm not sure where or what I would be doing today.  FOR ME, researching the paranormal and trying to find out ways to stay in touch with my grandfather(Nan...that's what I called him) without me even knowing it..... kept me from falling into a deep depression and many times in my life has caused me to FOCUS on something other than whatever bad things might be going on in my life....because I HAVE found ways to communicate with my grandfather and understand more today than ever....he has never left me!!!  This is MY way of staying in touch with him and I feel like we are doing this together. :)

See the truth is... as much as we would like to.....and as much as we would like to HOLD ON to our loved ones.....we have to let them go........BUT we don't have to say GOOD-BYE!  Our loved ones are watching over us always.....and they only want us to be happy NOT sad.  So....if you can change the way you think..........to lets say.......they are NOT really gone......and I WILL see them again someday......but until then........you kinda' have to have a LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP. LOL.  I know that's probably not the best way to say it....but sorry....it's the best way I know how.  Just like in a long distance relationship you may not always get to see them.....but you can talk to them anytime you like and believe it or not, sometimes...just talking with them is enough.

So, I guess what I want you to know....is DON'T fall into that depression......don't let the death of someone you love consume your life HERE in the real world.......that doesn't help you, your family or friends.........CHANGE DIRECTIONS.........you still can talk with your loved ones.....just long distance. :)

WHY ARE THEY STILL HERE??? WHY DO THEY STAY???

 

'Behind every man now alive stands 30 ghosts, for that is the ratio by which the dead outnumber the living.'  ARTHUR C. CLARKE, 2001: A Space Odyssey

The dead are all around us.  We are surrounded by ghosts, but most of us are unaware of their presence because we are preoccupied with our daily routine and our physical needs...... feed the kids breakfast, take them to school, make sure your spouse has money for the toll, pick up groceries, mow the yard, cook dinner, work out(lol)...well I think you get the point when I say "preoccupied".

So, just yesterday, I was asked "why do they stay around?"  Does it mean they HAVEN'T gone to heaven or can't until they complete some task?  hhhuuummm Let's think about that....

Invisible visitors might not be ghosts at all, but guides or guardian angels, but I don't think the name we give disembodied spirits is of importance.  The important thing is....THEYARE HERE!  Sensing their presence is sufficient to signify that there is another reality beyond our physical world, a belief that appears to be confirmed by the countless number of near-death experiences reported by people of diverse beliefs and backgrounds and from all around the world from ancient times to the current day.

So, now what? We KNOW they ARE here...we can sense them all around us.....their smell.....their touch.....we here their voices......we see their faces......we hear them and see things they have moved around to make their presence known.  Right? Right.

Ok....we have all heard that ghosts are here because they have "unfinished business", they don't know that they have died....or something more tragic....and they CAN NOT move on.  I believe, and again this is MY OPINION, that ALL the statements above are TRUE.  I do believe that some spirits stay behind because they died so quickly that they are a bit confused and don't really know what has happened to them...so that is where we come in....and encourage them to "go to the light" or "go ahead and cross over from this world".

Now, lets talk about "unfinished business".  Just because a spirit has "unfinished business" here in this world....DOESN'T mean that they have NOT gone on to heaven.  Sometimes, when someone leaves this world they have "unfinished business" that they need to fulfill to either help themselves or someone else.  Example:  Loving husband dies suddenly and his devastated wife is left to manage the household without him.  This is sooooo overwhelming to her and all she thinks about is their plans to retire, buy an RV and travel....now those plans can never happen.  She falls deep into depression.  God is a loving God and allows the husband to come back and help her with their "unfinished business".  Doesn't mean that he will not be allowed back in heaven...it just means God has allowed him to help his beloved wife.  So, out of the blue....the wife starts getting mail advertising RV's for sale and she suddenly feels her husband saying..."get up and go! You can do this!"  Then one day she receives a letter from a life insurance company explaining that she has just received her husbands benefit money that he had bought years and years ago that she knew nothing about.  And along with the letter is a picture of an RV.     What do you think???......... Did he FINISH his UNFINISHED BUSINESS????  :)

Now, yes they can come down from heaven and visit us....help us and be there when we need them...... BUT sometimes.......I do believe that ISN'T always the case.  Sometimes malevolent spirits that were not NICE(so to speak) here on earth don't get to change....and suddenly become nice and just float away into heaven.....so these spirits are very unpleasant and resent sharing their possessions or personal space with the living.  Because of the life they lived here on earth.......well.....lets jut say they have a really hard time getting to where they need to be....either heaven or....???  And to some spirits....being "trapped" is Hell.

But until I die and can come back and give you guys more answers to your questions(lol)....we ALL have to reach our own conclusions.  And you know........maybe that is the way it is meant to be..... this way.....some of us are in search of evidence of the paranormal and some of us will NEVER believe in it............ different things for different people.......just saying.  :)
 

ANGELS....ARE THEY SENT FROM HEAVEN ABOVE?

So first.....I know my post is late but I'm on vacation with my family and trying to keep up is a little crazy!!!  But I didn't want you guys to think I forgot you. :)

Now, lets talk angels.  To most people when you say the word ANGEL they think of a beautiful lady in white with wings floating above us in the clouds.  Well, they may be, but in my opinion, angels take many different forms.  Have you ever heard people refer to perfect STRANGERS as their "Guardian angels"?  Let's say, you where held at gunpoint....and from out of know where a stranger shows up and wrestles the robber to the ground and then you never see or hear from that person again?  Are they REALLY your guardian angel?  You better know they very well could be! 

Many believe that GOD chooses his angels to come down from Heaven to protect and guide us.  What do I believe?  I DO believe GOD allows certain love ones to watch over us and protect us. I think they "show" themselves many times...in many different ways.  I can't say that I have ever SEEN an angel in the FORM that most people think....but I CAN TELL you that I FEEL them all the time...I see the SIGNS that I think I am suppose to see.  Angels are all around us all the time all WE have to do is pray and OPEN our minds that the LITTLE THINGS aren't just a coincidence.

Below is a picture I took at the Alamo several years back.  I believe this is an angel.   Is it just me???

 

IS THERE MORE PARANORMAL ACTIVITY AFTER A NATURAL DISASTER?

The simple answer is "yes".  It has long been reported that after a natural disaster has occurred  that people almost immediately start to report sightings of ghosts.  Think about all the reasons someone "stays behind"....... unfinished business, can't leave their loved ones, confused-don't know they are dead and many more ......who really knows but wouldn't you agree that in a natural disaster ALL of those reasons would be running through the minds of the victims?  Where there were a lot of "emotional attachments" or "feelings" at a location.....usually the paranormal activity is pretty high.

So, if you think about it.....in a natural disaster such as a hurricane, tornado, earthquake, fire, explosions, etc. what do all these things have?  EMOTION.  Can you imagine the FEAR and the CONFUSION during a natural disaster as a earthquake or hurricane?  Where are my loved ones? What is happening? Am I going to die? What will my loved ones do without me? What about my beloved pets....who will take care of them?  I can't die, I won't get to see my kids grow up?  My husband or wife can't make it without me!  ALL of these things running through YOUR mind......now take that and times it by hundreds and thousands of people thinking the same thing!  The energy in a location like this must be crazy!!!!Confusion, helplessness and chaos running through the minds of the living..........but also of the DEAD!!!
 
So many times spirits don't even KNOW what happened to them.  Things happened so fast that they don't even realize that they have died and so they try live the same way they always did.   But now maybe with a bit more confusion as to what happened and why their loved ones don't see them or respond to them.  And for us the living, sometimes this can be very hard.  Because keep in mind, helping them into the light, going to heaven, crossing over whatever you want to call it, is what we need to do..... being STUCK is not where you want your loves.  So as hard as it may be, we must let them know what happened and that they have died and need to move on.  I know if I lost my grandparents in a natural disaster and didn't get to say "Bye" or tell them "I loved them" it would be hard for me.....but here's the thing......keeping them HERE with US is a little on the selfish side.  Sorry, but that's they way I feel.  Keeping them HERE is for US to feel better, NOT what is best for THEM.

You know me, I am going to put it in "Becky Terms".  It's like having a beautiful butterfly in a jar.  Man...it is soooo pretty to look at and it makes you smile every time you look at it......BUT is being in that jar REALLY what is best for the butterfly??? Or would it be better to let it go.....so that it could fly up into the sky roaming around where ever it likes? Anyway, you get the picture. :)

It is VERY sad when something like this happens, and make NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT.....my heart goes out to anyone who has ever had to deal with this, but it does cause a location to become more haunted or active.  So, if you are ghost hunting, a site where a natural disaster occurred is probably a good location to investigate.  And again, be respectful of the place you are investigating.

MY REVIEW OF HEAVEN IS FOR REAL-WHY WOULD YOU DOUBT IT????

Now I normally wouldn't write about a movie but I just can't help myself.....I just saw Heaven is For Real and I thought it was amazing!!! Now, it is not full of action...no sex.....no suspense.....but this movie (for me) was very real and... very positive and I think we could ALL use a little more positive in our lives. It is about a little boy who has a near death experience and goes to heaven and comes back and tells what it is like. This movie is full of hope.... and for me.....it was VERY inspirational !!!! You will cry but when you live the movie theater you will feel alive and know that Heaven is real and all the good things God promised about it are true. And our loved ones.....they wait for us and we will all be together again. Now, I don't proclaim to be a so called "religious person" although I Do believe in God and pray and believe he is our creator. I also believe in Heaven and Hell. Whether you are "religious" or not...go see this movie...

Now, I don't want to get into religion, but after seeing this show, I even believe more....than our loved ones are watching over us and this gives me a very comforting feeling. And for those of you who know me....and know WHY I started researching the paranormal over 30 years ago ....I couldn't help but feel that my NAN(grandfather)was smiling down on me....and saying.....don't stop what you are doing......I am proud of you and know you are doing it with love in your heart.

Sorry, that was WAY long and way to on the serious side. Listen, for those of you I have talked to and are grieving...this movie might lift your spirits. Go see it....and I hope it makes you feel as good as it did me!

Below is the actual picture a young girl drew who she says is Jesus(same experience as the little boy in the movie) and it is also the picture the little boy in the movie said he looked like. Just wanted to share it with you.